Fear

I have a fear. Well, let's be honest. I have a lot of fears. Funny how during my Bible study time in Isaiah last week fear was mentioned. Well, let's be honest, fear was more than mentioned. It was shoved in my face. Isn't that how Bible study usually works? When you really start to get in and dig into scripture, God goes ahead and uses it to change your life? I guess that truly is a good thing. A hard thing, yes, but also very good.

Do not fear what they fear, do not dread it. The Lord Almighty is the one you are to regard as holy, he is the one you are to fear, he is the one you are to dread. Isaiah 8:12-13

At first when I thought about the first part of the verse and the fearing what they fear part I thought about the BIG STUFF. You know, like the fact that my daughter has to grow up in this sin-ridden world. Or fear of the economy crumbling underneath our feet, the leaders of our country making a total mess of things, violence, crime, sickness in my family, etc. Things that can literally raise my heart rate and get me spinning off into a world of made up problems that simply do not exist.

Don't read this wrong, there is something we are to fear... the Lord. What I realized is that when I am fearing the BIG STUFF, I am taking my eyes off of the holiness of God. I am saying, "Okay, God, like I totally know you are holy and stuff, but this...THIS, is something I am going to have to fear, because I just can't trust you enough (or more seriously - I do not fear you enough or put enough reverence into who you are) to follow your commands and leave.it.alone.in.your.hands.already."

So, I've been mulling over this for the past week and tonight it hit me that I still don't have it right. See, my problem is that I categorized what Isaiah was saying into not fearing the BIG STUFF. But, what about the small stuff? Like being fearful of putting Lauren in her toddler bed? Or getting rid of her pacifier? Bringing a new baby into our home? Oh yeah, those things. Isn't it the same thing? Yes. It is. Do those things consume my mind? Cause my heart rate to increase? Take my eyes and attention from the Lord? So, when I fear the small things, it is like saying to God, "Okay, God, I know what your word says, but I am going to put my own spin on it...you know the one that works for me and say that the small things I can fear. I know you are involved in the big things, but I can't trust you enough (or in other words - I don't believe that you care about the small details and fears of my life) to follow your commands and leave.it.alone.in.your.hands.already."

I love when God's word uses, "Do not..." because I am no Bible scholar, but I am pretty sure I get what those words mean. Isaiah isn't saying here to ONLY fear when... or to Do not fear this stuff, but fear the rest. Nope. He says, "Do not fear or dread it." Period.

I am told not to fear those things, but to fear the Lord. To turn to him always. To focus my attention on him and NOT on the fears of this world. Big or small. That is where is rubs a little. Big or small. No matter what brings fear into my life, I am to turn from that desire in me to fear it, and put that energy into reverencing my Lord. 

I know this post was a jumble of words and thoughts just kind of spewed onto the page, but I needed to get it down. I am no expert at not being fearful, but I am committed to learning what God has for me through this verse.