those poor babies on american idol

I've been an avid fan of American Idol for years and I'm gonna be real honest here...I've always been pretty critical of the people performing. I mean I have such expertise on judging people's musical skills *insert sarcastic grin* and all.

Anyway, I have never really experienced the feelings that I have been feeling this year. Maybe it's because I am a momma, maybe I am just PMSing. I don't really know, but all I can think about is that each one of those performers is somebody's baby. And for ever harsh and critical word the judges dole out, there is a mom whose heart breaks in pieces. A mom who aches as she watches her child face rejection head on. A mom who would probably duke it out with Simon and take him. After all, he's bashing her baby.

And so this year I sit and cheer and cry (only a couple of times) and think of those moms out there.

the sickness

We are now on round 3 of sickness in our home. It has firmly attached itself to my husband and he is none so happy about it. Honestly, neither am I. Oh I love the boy, and I love him even when he is sick but coming off of Lauren being sick for two weeks straight and the sinus infection that was out to kill me, I am kind of over it. I want my family healthy. I want to be able to carry on a conversation with my hubby without it involving the color of Lauren's snot, how fussy she has been, or how bad either of our throats currently hurt. I'm ready to take Lauren out of this house. Out where the people are. I want to not be fearful that someone is going to launch their nasty germs on us and get us all sick again - or that we would launch our nasty germs on some unsuspecting person and get them sick. I kind of just want my life back. And, I want spring. I want color and the smell of growth and gentle breezes perfect for sending bubbles floating on. That's not too much to ask now is it? I mean, seriously?!?!

looking for...

UPDATE: I won an auction on Ebay for the Southern Living at Home version of this plate! I am so excited because I have already thought of a million things I can do with it - oh, and it was way cheaper than the one shown below!!!!


The Write Plate:

I am on the lookout for a plate like the one above from The Write Plate. You can weave the ribbon through the slots on the outside and write messages on the inside. Anyone have any ideas? Southern Living used to have one, but it is now discontinued. I've found it on ebay...but it is still kind of pricey! Any help you have would be greatly appreciated!!!

piggy tail love

Yesterday was a big day in our house because Lauren Avery wore her very first set of piggy tails!!! I decided that it was time to try it so after her bath I took her to my bathroom and set her on the sink so she could see herself in the mirror. She watched me make each piggy tail and just smiled at herself in the mirror. It might sound silly, but it was a moment I will cherish in my heart forever.



I was so proud of her because she didn't try to take them out one time all evening. And because she looked absolutely adorable!!! How in the world did we go from almost no hair to piggy tails?


Lauren, I love you. I love your piggy tails. I love your sweet spirit and your silliness. I am thrilled that we have many more girlie moments ahead of us. Oh the trouble we could get into!

i'm sorry, are you sure that's right?

So, yesterday at the doctor's office I got weighed. I was pretty out of it, but not so much that I didn't catch sound of a lot of extra pounds rolling off of the nurse's lips. What? Seriously? Last March was the last time I saw a doctor. At that time I weighed 10 pounds less than I do now. I have gained 10 pounds in one year. I'd be lying if I said that realization didn't really bother me.

Here is how I gained weight:
~I quit nursing, and kept eating like I was
~I took up a mad obsession with Coca Cola
~I stopped exercising
~I took up snacking while watching TV in the evenings (popcorn, pickles, cake, etc)

Here is how I plan on taking it off:
~Stop snacking on unhealthy "stuff"
~Quit the Coke
~Exercise
~No snacks/food after 7 pm

Can I do it? I don't know. I have like no will power so this should be interesting!

holy guacamole

I have been craving guacamole lately. If you know me at all, you know that I usually do not like that nasty looking green stuff and will happily scoot it right off of my plate to yours. Not anymore. I don't know what triggered this sudden and ginormous love for the guacamole and chips. But I am diving in head first and making up for some lost years.

Saturday before I started feeling REALLY bad, Shawn took me to Branson. Woot woot! We shopped and then went to eat at Cantino Laredo because my man and I love us some Mexican food. Suddenly as we were sitting there, I realized I wanted guacamole. I wanted it bad. I wanted it enough to forget about the hefty $10 price tag and go for it.

The guy, also known as our waiter, brought all the fixins and made the guacamole right there at our table. Oh my goodness, I was salivating as I waited patiently for that first bite. I would have taken a picture of the process, but I had a feeling that might creep him out a bit. Especially when I explained that I was just going to put it on the world wide web and all.

No worries, though - I got an action shot of the first dip


Sure, it is a little dark, but we were going for the action shot. Those aren't always perfect anyway.

My two loves together, Shawn and guacamole:

spring please come quickly

If I were feeling up to it there would be pictures for this post. However, I am not feeling up to it and so you just get my words. Lucky you.

I am sick. I've been sick since Thursday. I literally felt it creep into my body Thursday afternoon when I was observing one of my darling practicum students teach her very first lesson ever. It was a weird experience.

Today I finally broke down and called the doctor. I went in this afternoon and found out that I've been dealing with a pretty intense sinus infection. That totally makes sense seeing as how the whole middle part of my face hurts like nothing and my ears keep popping. I opted for the shot and a week long stint of antibiotics and I am hoping and praying that I will feel better very, very, very soon.

Is anybody else ready for spring?

back to school, back to school, to prove to dad I'm not a fool....

Yesterday was my first day of being in the school observing practicum students. It was strange being back in school and yet not really being "back". I was there, but not a part of it. Students didn't need me for anything. I didn't have a class trailing me down the hall. I didn't have a classroom of my own or even an understanding of the layout of the school. It was different.

I really enjoyed watching my practicum girls teach. They are so young and excited and eager to learn. I am thrilled to be helping them grow in any way I can.

I saw lots of tiny kids and I thought of Lauren going to school. Thankfully, I was able to suppress the sadness that welled up so huge inside of me and remember that she is 18 months old. Unfortunately, then I remembered how fast the past 18 months have gone and how fast the next years will be and that before I know it she will be walking down a school hallway with her lunchbox in hand and I had to pick myself up off the cold tile floor and breathe into a paper bag.

If you need me today I will just be hugging on my little girl and looking at her newborn pictures and whispering in her ear over and over - don't grow up too soon, don't grow up too soon, don't grow up too soon, okay? ;)

ummmm....do you realize that we are totally grown-ups now?

We went to eat dinner last night with our friends Tanner and Kelly. Have I ever told the story of how we met? No, well maybe I will sometime. Maybe I won't. I am bad with blog promises. I'll give you a teaser - it wasn't in this country.

We met a while before this season of parenthood that we are now all in and honestly when I look back it seems like eons ago! We used to stay up until *gasp* 1 or 2 in the morning playing board games, guitar hero, or watching movies. We ordered pizza often and usually had a standing date twice a month.

Flash forward to last night. As Kelly and I were putting down the sticky placemats and the men were wrangling the children into the seat protector covered high chairs I stopped and said, "do you guys realize that we are totally grown-ups now?" It was a weird moment. A good moment, but definitely weird. See, this was our first dinner out as two families instead of two couples. I don't know how it has been this long but I am going to totally blame it on the crazy way that having a baby changes your life or something like that.

Anyway, there we were... a table of six instead of a table of four. A table of six very happy, extremely busy, quickly eating, baby pacifying friends.

The kiddos, Lauren and Ryan. Lauren liked to try to feed him.

Trying to get them both to look. Yeah right.

Kelly and her little man, Ryan.

Little miss Lolo and me.

Ryan looks so happy to be a part of their family. :)

I was tickling Lauren's leg to get her to smile. She refuses to smile and usually just gives a blank stare. Goofy girl!

I feel so blessed to be enjoying/enduring this new season of parenthood with these guys. Yes, our lives may look different than they did three years ago, but not a single one of us would change it.

we ask ourselves...

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?

And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone."

Shining Light - Nelson Mandela's Speech by Marianne Williamson

g-pa

My dad stopped by the house last Thursday after flying back from a meeting. Lauren was asleep, but that didn't stop G-Pa from getting her up.

She was a little confused at first when he went to wake her up, but that changed really quickly.

It wasn't long before she was pulling him into the kitchen to play with play-doh. I thought it was funny because the first thing my dad did was smell the play-doh. I asked him why he did that and he said he wanted to know if it still smelled the same. It does! Why mess with a good thing, right?

G-Pa taught her how to roll the dough into a ball. She was hooked!

A play-doh snowman!

This cracked me up! Big guy in a little chair!!!

It was so good to see you, Daddy! I am so thankful that Lauren has grandparents on both sides who love her and are willing to get right in there and enjoy her world with her. She is one blessed girl and so am I.

joy

Today I chased joy down the hall and back again

It floated among the giggles in the air

It spun and danced and asked me to join

It folded its tiny hands for prayer

Today I caught joy in the crayon marks and play-doh

In an extravagant feast of plastic food

It kissed my arm and said, “oww ov ou”

It gave me peace when the day was through

My heart is so full tonight. Full of love for my daughter. Full of thankfulness that she is healthy, that she is here. I wish I could give these thoughts life in words, but I can't. There is just simply too much.