Thursday, October 11, 2012

The Day of Yes

I'm an amazing mom...

...when my kids are asleep. 

I have incredible patience, energy, and love to give them. I play with them without a wandering mind. I correct with a soft voice and never sigh loudly or roll my eyes. We stay on a consistent routine and I never keep them out past their nap times. I am not selfish and I willingly share the last bite of my coveted pumpkin muffin. I plan fun and engaging lessons and we take weekly field trips. I don't count the minutes until nap time or until Shawn gets home. 

Yep, when my kids are asleep I am the mom I've always dreamed I'd be. 

But, I'm going to be completely transparent here, when my kids are awake and they add their own personalities and bodies and issues to the mix, I fail miserably. Or, at least I don't live up to my own expectations. 

I'm learning some things though. First and foremost, I'm learning that parenting is not a one person job. It isn't even a job held between spouses. To parent well I have to be in it with God. I've got to daily rely on Him to fill me and give me the grace do this thing He's called me to. Daily. 

I'm also learning that if I'm not engaged in my job, it loses it's luster and starts to feel tedious and mundane. Too many things vie for my attention these days. Social media especially has a way of sneaking in and taking up way too much of my mind and time and energy....and taking it away from my kids. When I am dis-engaged, I know they know. I wonder if much of the discipline issues we have been facing have come from my being only half heartedly there?

I'm not at all saying that I should be hovering over my kids one hundred percent of the day. Its good for them to play independently and to play together without me. And, let's face it this house would collapse in on itself if I didn't do some housework and laundry. But, I guess I'm just wondering if the time I did have with my kids was me being completely there and not distracted, would it change their behavior? Would it flame my passion for being a mama again? 

It's worth a try, right?

So....on that note, I've deemed tomorrow to be the Day of Yes. The day of yes means that I'm going to give my kids more of me tomorrow (and I'm sort of hoping it will stick :))  When Lolo asks to build that fort, I'm going to say yes (and have fun doing it with her!) When Easton wants a horsey back ride, I'm going to guessed it, yes!

I'm putting it out here because I'm letting the two of you who read this (Hi, Papa and Meme!!!) know that you have complete permission to text me and ask me if I'm saying YES to my kids tomorrow. :) 

Here's to being all in tomorrow! Here's to relying on God to help me say yes when the dishes beckon or I am all out of energy. Here's to the Day of Yes!

1 comment :

  1. I love this!! There are so many truths in this post for me as a teacher, too. I can get so distracted by keeping on schedule, grading papers, cleaning up the room, conferencing, creating assessments, etc.. Thank you for the reminder about being present more and allowing moments for kids to be kids!